Feeling Log

Feelings that I feel I've been feeling recently:

Feeling #1
                       

A mixture of guilt and disgust at myself. Mostly from wasting hours of my life on meaningless computer-related addictions. Kind of like the feeling you get after eating fried chicken. During, you think nothing of the torrents of oil and fat you are consuming. After, you feel kind of gross, and wonder, "Was it worth it?". Due to the similarities, we are officially naming this feeling the Post-Fried Chicken Syndrome. PFCS for short.

Feeling #2
                       
Bursts of creativity, or what I'm deluded enough to believe is creativity. A phrase or idea materializes in my head, and I get really excited and grab a notebook. Most of said phrases and ideas don't end up being very good, so they don't make the cut of appearing on my blog. Here at I Will Not Be Silent, we pride ourselves in having impeccably high standards. Yeah I said 'we'. I think its because I'm oh so lonely. Anyway, we'll call this one the Diet Coke High. Since, for me, these feelings usually occur under the influence of the delightfully bubbly soft drink. Because of the caffeine. I could care less about calories.

Feeling #3
                        
Conflicted. Like when I think about my situation    a problem with no easy answer. Burdened. I feel responsible, the only one who sees that something is wrong. Hopeless. Anything I could possibly think of wouldn't fix or even make things better. Alone. No one would understand. No one would know what to do either. This one doesn't have a name.

Feeling #4
                        
I feel like spending every waking moment with someone. Like bursting out of my chest and leaving behind body and mind to be with her. Like writing a song for every little thing she does or says. Like belting love songs too high for my voice and not caring who else hears. Like having conversations without words, only stolen glances and smiles so wide they stretch the sides of our faces. Like never waking up from the dream where all this can happen. If only...



So ends the first entry in my feeling log. By the end of this, I wish to catalog and explain most of the silly emotions humans go through in life. Four down. A lot more to go.